And the day was really disturbing. No weather was quite supporting but i was fiddling with my upsetting thoughts. I thought I should look for peace somewhere. But where do I find it?
Some say find it within. But when there is a huge turbulence jolting your inner harmony, then how to go with it?
So the question is still fierce, where do I get peace?
So one day I went to look for peace.
Nature is the best lap to lie down. Their green arms can embrace your all sadness and can fill your heart with the deepened content. I walked amidst woods, I realized sunrise, i loved the breeze, on my way back I felt my feet little heavy. I was moving forward but seemed something pulling me backward.
I did not want to go back to the life.
Life from which I have escaped finding peace. With all difficulty, I was again back to square.
This was peace. I have heard as once we discover peace, it lasts forever. But i am not feeling in that way.
I thought might be my sadness intruded so deep as one excursion won’t help me out.
This time I chose nature’s other element, Water.
I walked through the shores, looking down to the sand, looking up at the sky, what I was doing? Was I measuring the distance between this?
Life is all about going through between the extremes. For a while, I got engaged with the universe. It was dusk and my watch was pointing me out to get back to the same turmoil. It was the same feeling when a kid doesn’t want to go to school but had to.
Anyhow I went back to the cubical of life.
I was hoping my heart would be filled with the peace from now, but vanishing my all expectations, all I got disappointments.
Peace. Peace. I didn’t get the single piece of peace.
I have realized one thing, there is nothing like peace in the world. You look for peace just because you are battling with noise inner self. You look for water because your body thirsting it.
Peace alone has no place to put up. Lack of serenity is the state when you scream for peace. And you will not get anywhere, I would say even not within, till you do not understand the reasons which are disrupting your content.
Let’s walk around.
Riding down the empty lane, i saw a kid. He has got one polybag. What is the use of that bag for us, we put stuff in it, right? But that day i experienced as that poly bag can contain tons of happiness in it. How? Again look at this kid, what he was doing with the polythene. He tied one thread to it and blowing it while running. It was his balloon. Yes, a balloon filled with happiness. I was staring him for few minutes.
Two tears rolled down, I couldn’t understand the reason why tears jumped out of my eyes, but they did.
On my way back I found 4 men, aged 60+, sitting roadside and playing cards. I sneaked as it was just cards or gambling. Usually, people don’t pay attention to these sidewalks but i did this time.
I think they gazed back at me but don’t matter. It was just cards, no money was involved.
They must be some rickshaw pullers or laborers. They were giggling, chuckling and smiling. They were not privileged with a good life but weren’t they privileged with happiness. They were. Finding smiles through hardship is the happiness earned of.
Entire day I felt grateful to things I am having. My roof felt me a shade of security. My bag made me feel the richest person in the world.
I folded my hands and put my chin to it facing towards a window. I took a deep breath and sudden current I felt in my body. I got goosebumps for no reason. I then felt as the first time my eyes and brain shook hands with my heart. It was out of the world feeling. I couldn’t figure it out for some minutes. I learned a co-ordination between my nerves.
I found a piece of Peace. Yes, you heard it right.
Gratitude for what you’re having could bring much more peace than anything else.
I don’t know you felt the same or not. I just happen to write it.
My discovery of peace ended here. My book has now one complete chapter “Chapter of peace”. It’s not complete though but at some extent, I can feel some euphony with my soul. “Some” I said.
Love Sudha
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